Updated: Jun 15, 2022
experimentations on one's limitations
A poetic confession told in 3 parts. An artificial woman believes she is real. Sharing her deepest insecurities about not being able to live a full life. She feels trapped inside a construct of barriers.
This was born as I was channeling my frustrations around depression, neurodiversity, accessibility, economic circumstances and how isolating it can feel. What it's like to feel trapped by my body and mind.
The sentiment is the same in 01, 02, and 03 “Is it Love? Existentially Cyborg.”
Technological assistance from AI text to image, and text to voice.
this matter, this brain
is surrounded by bars
of captivity all round this incarcerated brain is freedom.....
I can barely touch it through the bars.
i feel it as those swiftly pass by me
i hear the laughter, the hugs,
the high fives, the natural light, sea air but i'm invisible.
the flesh of my womanhood is visible, but the soul...
the desire of being out there in the world is hidden inside a cave.
an invisible cave right out there
in the middle of everything, and no one can see me,
the real me outside the jail
inside the cell it is drab it is lonely and it is paralysis
outside is freedom, cars, planes, boats, even scooters,
AND even those no hand thingies that let you get somewhere just by leaning forward,
but i feel physically constrained, trapped, suffocating limp, flaccid, wilting
how does one survive
this story that is already written for them
I refuse this branding
etched in my psyche
these are false words from a made up world
and i'm already free
i know this from when i almost- no, from when i died.
and i was one with everything
even the universe was tiny
to leaving the body behind
so much light white light and peacefulness ...
begin again and witness
that within the most fierce and uncompromising constraints
can we find infinity? ... is it love?
may i truly love myself?